Queen of the Road

For a couple of weeks there I was pretty down in the dumps, struggling to find my inner motivation and fire. Then, I got that email about the King of the Road 5K and registered. What a gift I gave to myself by signing up. From the minute I got dressed in all my new cold gear on Sunday, I knew it was my day - my race! First of all, those tights make me feel like a million bucks, and secondly, I was actually not freezing in 30-40 degree temperatures. Those are some pretty important victories when it comes to the psyche of this particular runner. When we were cued to line up, I was the most zen I've been before the start. While there were hundreds of people there, anxiety wasn't at all a factor. I was dancing and smiling and pumped to begin the 3.1 mile trek. From my first stride to my last, I felt so incredibly "in the zone". This course was relatively flat compared to others I've run, but I'm not sure that mattered too much. Everyone around me seemed pleasant and even a few cheered me on as we passed one another. How cool is that!? No pushing or shoving, just good natured runners sharing the road. That said, as with any race, the biggest battle I wage is with myself. You have to be mentally strong to keep going when you feel as though there isn't an ounce left to give. This was never more true than when I completed mile two. At the start of the final third of the race was a dreaded hill - long and pretty steep. At this point I had yet to walk (I've never lasted more than one mile without a short walk break). The devil on one shoulder was whispering, "Take a break!" The angel on my other shoulder was whispering, "Never walk uphill!" When I centered my focus on the "Never walk" whispers, I was able to tell myself to push through, not quit, and you've got this! When the hill was behind me I knew I'd reached a new level of strength. If I could beat that hill, I could take on what was left ahead of me. So I kept on running until crossing the finish line at full speed. It was by far the most exhillirating and triumphant finish so far - even more than my first race. I was so excited and proud of myself, I cried! To many people a 5K is nothing much. I'm not taking on marathons or anything, but I am achieving more with each race than I ever imagined for myself. I posted to my FaceBook page that "I'm not the fastest, but I'm determined. I'm not a size 2, but I'm healthy. I'm not perfect, but I'm blessed. I run because it gives me more than what I could ever leave on the pavement." Nothing could be more true. With the weight I have lost, I have gained infinite amounts more in confidence and belief in myself. I had no idea how much that had been missing and for far too long. Never doubt yourself. Greatness is in all of us. We may not find it through medals or awards, but through blasting through the barriers and roadblocks we create for ourselves. I was a big winner yesterday when I recorded a personal best, ran non-stop, beat the 35 minute mark for the first time, and saw a more than two and a half minute improvement on my time over the past six months. I finished in 34 minutes and 56 seconds. I was still in the bottom half of racers, but that doesn't matter. What counts is that I get out there, and I never give up! That makes me the Queen of the Road!  





Post-Race High!



I'm a Junkie!

Recently, it has come to my attention that I am a full on junkie. I don't mean this to alarm anyone - or to belittle issues involved with serious and life threatening addiction - but I believe in always being honest with my peeps. And, honestly, I have some serious attachment stuff going on these days. For example, let me share with you that my "smart phone" is like my life support. It is an extension of my person. Nowhere do I go without it - walking the dog, getting my baby off to sleep, out for a run, at work, it's even my alarm clock! I have full on anxiety at the thought of leaving it at home in the morning, it being stolen, the screen cracking, etc. And really, don't we all use these mobile devices less as a phone than anything else. I access Facebook, take pictures, play games, check email, text, look up recipes, get directions, and on and on and on. It's amazing. Really, I LOVE MY PHONE (and yes, I love it so much I could marry it, if I wasn't already taken)! What really brought my junkie status to light, though, was what happened to me this past Wednesday. I received an email about a 5K race on Sunday. I barely blinked before checking with my hubby about the date/time and registering. As I write this, I am only two days from race day. What?! Who is this person? I am addicted to races. I mean, I love running, but come on, this is getting silly. The email was like a super strong and uber intense magnet pulling me in. It was as if I had no chance of deleting the message. I was destined to run again. After my last race, where you will remember my hands nearly fell off from being so frozen, I had thought it was time to hang up my running shoes for the season. Ummm...apparently not. I've decided running doesn't have to stop for the cold - nor do I. Today, I am headed to a running store here in Rockville to invest in some good cold gear - gloves, something for my ears, and some running tights. Nothing is going to sideline this chica! I am in it for the long haul...or at least 3.1 miles. :) To round this post out, aside from the obvious obsession I have with my hubby and girls, I will also have you know that I can not live without McDonald's coffee at least once a day (large, three creams) and at least one fistfull of almonds. These are imperative to my existence, well-being, and happiness. Without these things, you'd just want to stand clear. So, there you have it - I am a junkie...and I like it!

Realizations

My most recent running experience was the Rockville 10K/5K. I participated in the 5K portion, which was grueling enough. It was an eye opening day for me, and it didn't take long for me to make some pretty big realizations. This was my fourth timed race and the largest I've participated in. As a person that doesn't enjoy crowds, the start was hard for me. I huddled on the right edge of the road to steer as clear of the mob at the gun as possible, but I was still knocked into pretty hard once and bumped on another occasion...not my fave! Once I reached the one mile marker it all seemed to calm down and people settled into their pace group. Phew! The only issue was that the first mile nearly took it all out of me. It was cold - really cold. My hands were burning and hurt to open up. There was a pre-race warm-up, but that was about 20 minutes before the start of the 5K. By the time I took off, my muscles were tight again. That, and the first mile included a very slow and steady incline that never seemed to end. I know all miles are literally the same length, but this one felt like it was at least 100. At 1.2 miles into the race I noticed that I was closer to where I'd parked my car than the end of the course, and I truly considered giving up and going home. Fortunately, though, the fighter in me wouldn't give up, and I pushed through the next hill, and the next hill, until I was on flat surface kicking it to the finish line. When I made it, I sat down to take the timing chip off my shoe and contemplated throwing up. Thankfully, that feeling passed...phew!...but a few thoughts and feelings stuck with me. And they were: 1. I am not a natural born runner. This is HARD work for me! This distance of 3.1 miles is still a challenge, and while I will keep working on it, I think this is where I am meant to be as a runner. In no way does this upset me. Some people never run a mile, much less complete a race. I'm simply proud that I show up and finish each and every 5K for which I register. I may never place against the other runners, but I am always winning the biggest battle, which is with myself. And I don't quit! 2. I am in complete and utter awe of those who are natural born runners. When I was nearing the finish, I was thinking, how are people running 6.2 miles today, much less running 15Ks, 10 milers, half marathons, marathons, and so on. Long distance runners are (a little crazy) to be admired. Seriously, I tip my hat to you - BRAVO! 3. I am going to encourage my daughters to participate in athletics throughout life, so that maybe they won't have as hard time being fit as an adult as me. Norah already loves running and push ups and sit ups and jumping jacks, which are also fun to watch her do. My job is to continue to be a model for her and allow her as many opportunities to exercise as possible. The same will go for Lillian once she gets beyond the "drunken toddler walk". I'm actually excited to see what they choose for themselves and what we'll be able to do as a family. There were many parent/child teams doing the race alongside me, and I found it inspiring and heartwarming. I hope to have that kind of experience with my girls one day. My official time was 35:58, :49 seconds behind my personal best. That said, I think this was my greatest effort. I had more obstacles to overcome to finish, and I did so with gusto. For having not trained well, running in colder weather than I've ever run, battling constant low grade inclines, and warding off tons of nutty runners on the course, I did the best I could do. Noone can ask more from themselves than that. I don't have any more races scheduled, so for now, there's boot camp and pull ups. Fitness isn't just the ability to run long distance, I also need to continue to work on my strength. Look for details on that very soon. Until then, don't give up! You may not be a natural born runner, but you are naturally YOU - and noone else in the world is that! Celebrate! :)

It's Sandy's Fault!

I have another race in just 3 days. Why is there no fire lit under my feet, urging me to run like the wind? UGH! Even my mind is sluggish today. I'd like to blame Hurricane Sandy for my lack of enthusiasm (I mean, everybody already hates her), but I know that though she may have kept me from running outside for a few days, she is not the root cause of my laziness. Truth be told, once you fall out of routine, it's very difficult to get back in the groove - at least for me. All the work responsibilities and bad weather and colds in my house got in the way of my workouts for a bit, and next thing you know, I am easily finding excuses to sit on my behind everyday (excluding chasing my girls all over the place). I keep looking around for something to put the spark back in my step, but that has to stop. The spark comes from most often from within and much less frequently from outside sources. I need to be my own inspiration and not forget the good feeling that running and lifting weights and attempting pull ups gives. Exercise is a reward and not something to be avoided. Carving out the time for myself is always a blessing, so I need to start putting myself on the backburner! To be honest, I should be sitting over high heat with water boiling. I have another race to run! Today ends my most recent string of excuses. I will, at a minimum, do my ab and arm routines after my baby goes to bed tonight and begin a new fitness routine. Not only do I deserve good health, I deserve all the good feelings and the high from physical activity. Consider the fire lit, and I'll let you know next week how I do with Sunday's 5K!